I would like to share with you the conversation I had with the Lord this morning as I walked my dogs. Some mornings I find it too difficult to keep up with Mitch and carry on a conversation at the same time, but this morning, my heart was heavy and my mind was swirling, and I knew if I didn't talk to the Lord, the entire walk would be spent with me focusing on my worries and fears. So, as I always do, I poured out my heart. Here's the gist of how our conversation went. (By the way, when God spoke to me, it wasn't in an audible voice. It was more of a still, small voice and a gentle nudging of my heart. Just wanted to make sure I cleared that up.)
Me: "It's me again, Lord. I wish I could say I was feeling good today, but it's just not so. Lord, it's been such an overwhelming month, and I know the past week you've done a lot to speak to me through sermons and songs. I know you're doing a good work, but I guess I'm growing impatient. It just seems like we've faced so many disappointments over the past few weeks. Just recently, we had an offer to buy Jason's Bronco, and after much prayer decided to sell it. Since then, the guy has yet to come by and look at it or come to an agreement. I was looking forward to having that extra money to help meet some needs and pay some upcoming bills. Then, there was the firewood disappointment. We went out on Saturday to get wood out near Jason's parents' house. All the good wood was buried, and all that we could get to was pine or very green pieces, not to mention they were all cut in weird sizes. On our way home, we stopped down the road from our house to pick up some pieces of wood that had been discarded in the ditch. The guy who lived there came out and said he cuts down trees for a living. In fact, he said he had to cut down some on Monday, and if we wanted it, he'd bring it to us. . . for free. Well, Monday has come and gone, and he still hasn't come. See what I mean, Lord? I don't mean to be disrespectful, but it's almost like You're going out of Your way to make things difficult for us. Isn't life hard enough? Aren't we struggling enough? I feel like we're praying for blessings but getting trials instead."
Lord: "Dana, I understand how you're feeling, but let me ask you a question. When you needed money last week to pay the mortgage, did I provide the money you needed?"
Me: "Well, yes. We received a generous gift from someone in my family."
Lord: "And were you able to get a trailer full of firewood on Saturday?"
Me: "Well, yes. We managed to pick through and get enough to fill the trailer after we added what we found at the end of our street."
Lord: "One more question, Dana. When you were worried last week that you wouldn't have the money to go the grocery store, what happened?"
Me: "Not only did I have enough money to go to the store, but just about everything I purchased was marked down or on sale. I saved almost as much as I spent."
Lord: "Do you see what I'm getting at, child?"
In that moment, my mind went back to the story of the children of Israel wandering in the desert. God provided them manna every morning, but just enough for that day. If the people tried to take extra "just in case", it would spoil. God was teaching His people to trust Him day by day. And evidently, God's been trying to teach me the same thing. To make sure I really got the point, He continued His lesson through my devotions.
After walking the dogs, I sat down and pulled up today's devotion on my phone. (I have a devotion/Bible reading app from YouVersion). The lesson was a devotion about God's daily provision, and the accompanying Bible passage was Matthew 6, which is a fabulous reminder that God knows what we need and that He will give us what we need when we need it. I read and smiled and laughed. Once again, God had turned my pity party into a praise party, and I just had to share it with you. He's so good to me, why, oh why, won't I trust Him?
Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed? (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Take
therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought
for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof. - Matthew 6:31-34
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