Conflicting Melodies

I love music.  Truth be told, I enjoy several different types of music and typically have some form of music playing throughout the day.  During my devotions, I enjoy soft, instrumental music that helps me reflect and meditate on God's Word.  While working around the house, there's nothing like good Southern Gospel or Contemporary Christian tunes to keep my toe tapping and my heart intent on worship.  At my desk, my music choice varies depending on what I'm doing.  If I'm doing intense writing, I need something soft and soothing (but not so much so that I fall asleep).  For less intense writing, I prefer instrumental music that is uplifting and bright, like Celtic melodies or epic movie soundtracks.  Every once in a while, I love to turn on classical pieces like Mozart, Beethoven or Rachmaninoff.  For other computer tasks, the music varies based on my present mood, but it's typically something lively and positive.

As you can see, I enjoy a variety of music, but one thing I cannot stand is to have two separate songs playing at once.  It drives me crazy!  For example, I play soft music when I go to sleep each night, and that music plays until I turn it off in the morning.  On Sunday mornings, however, I have my clock radio tuned to come on because a local station offers Southern Gospel music on Sunday mornings.  Sure enough, at 7:00, the radio comes to life, and I began to scramble.  I have to turn off the music that is playing on my phone because the two conflicting melodies wreak havoc in my mind.  I simply cannot stand it.

It doesn't seem to bother most people.  In fact, Jason can sit down and play his bass along with some music through his headphones while I'm listening to something else through the house radio.  The thing about his headphones is that they don't block out outside noise.  They keep others from hearing what he's listening to but are not designed to work the other way around.  That means he's hearing both pieces of music and playing along.  With what?  How could he possibly know what to play?  For the life of me, I can't figure out which melody to tune in and which one to tune out.  It's frustrating!

And do you want to know the most frustrating part of it all?  I have conflicting melodies flowing through my mind and heart all the time.  One melody proclaims, "Have thine own way, Lord; have thine own way" while the other serenades "I planned each charted course, each careful step along the byway. And more, much more than this, I did it my way."  Yes, I constantly find my will at odds with God's will.  I don't mean for it to be that way.  I want to serve God and to fulfill His will for my life, but when it comes down to following certain orders, those confounded melodies begin to clash, and I find myself having to choose which one to tune in and which to tune out.  I wish I could say that I always make the right decision, but if I did, I probably wouldn't be writing this post.  After all, how many of you want to hear about the perfect little redhead who always follows the Lord's directions and never takes a wrong turn?  Yeah, that's what I thought.

The truth is, I'm human, and I make many mistakes along the way.  Fortunately, the God I serve is a God of grace.  He loves me in spite of my failures and somehow, He still finds a way to make beautiful music out of my life.  Knowing this doesn't give me an excuse to sin or to do things my own way.  On the contrary, it makes me want to serve Him more--to tune out the melody that is my will and to tune in to His.

Now the God of peace, that brought again from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great shepherd of the sheep, through the blood of the everlasting covenant, Make you perfect in every good work to do his will, working in you that which is wellpleasing in his sight, through Jesus Christ; to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen. - Hebrews 13:20-21