Living With Unrealistic Expectations

I have a confession to make--I often set very unrealistic expectations.  The problem is that I don't just set them for myself; I set them for everyone around me too.  My poor husband knows the truth of this.  I am still convinced, after fifteen years of marriage, that I found my Prince Charming.  The trouble is that after a fifty-hour work week and very little sleep, the prince can lose some of his charm.  And when he loses his charm, I lose my cool.  How dare he not live up to my expectations to be sweet, caring, romantic and happy all the time?  The poor prince!

Sadly, I do the same thing with friends, family members and especially myself.  If you think I'm hard on Jason, you've not seen or heard anything yet.  You should hear the way I talk to myself.  You should hear the insults and accusations I throw my way.  It's depressing, to say the least.  Why, oh why, do I set standards that I can't possibly live up to?

And, of course, I also set unrealistic expectations about my circumstances.  Let's take my health, for an example.  On Monday, I decide that I need to do something about the pudge around my middle.  For a week straight, I watch for calorie intake, I exercise, I stretch, I take my vitamins.  I do all the right things, but unfortunately, I expect the wrong results.  Well, actually, I expect the right results, but I expect them too soon.   By Friday, I hop on the scale, eager to see the two to five pounds I've lost because of my week of sacrifice.  Would you believe that stupid scale has the audacity to show me a number higher than what it was on Monday?  The nerve!!!!  I'd been so good.  How could I possibly weigh more?

Or how about this one?  I've surrendered my life to Jesus.  I'm walking in His footsteps and fulfilling His plan for my life.  I seek His face daily, eager to maintain true communication with Him and desiring nothing more than to do His will.  Surely that means my walk through life will be a pleasant one devoid of detours and potholes, right?  If ever there were an unrealistic expectation, that would be it!  Where do we get the idea that the Christian life should be a bed of roses?  I know better.  I know that Jesus promised tribulation.  I know that He said we would suffer if we stayed true to Him.  Yet, somehow, for some reason, I expect something different. 

Four years ago, I walked away from a steady income to pursue a career in writing.  I knew it would be difficult and frightening, but I also knew, without a doubt (most of the time), that it was God's will.  Yet four years have passed, and I'm still struggling to sell just a few books each month.  Some days, God's great plan for my life doesn't seem so great.  It doesn't feel so great.  It seems pointless.  It feels discouraging.  I expected more.  I expected to succeed in a way that my income would match and eventually pass the income I was making as a teacher.  I didn't expect to become an overnight success, but I certainly expected to be much farther along than I am currently.  I expected God to honor my faithfulness and obedience by providing the income we need to get out of debt, put new tires on the vehicle, fix the leaky roof and do all the other things that need to be done.

This morning I had to ask myself a very sobering question:  "Am I giving God the cold shoulder because I feel He's let me down?  Am I angry with Him for not meeting my expectations?"  When others don't meet my expectations, I don't hesitate to let them know, either by my explosion of emotion or by my withdrawal of it.  Have I done the same with God?  I know I haven't exploded His way, but have I withdrawn?  Have I pulled away from His presence because I feel He's not taken care of me?  It sounds foolish, I know, but we often do foolish things.  Deep down in my heart, I know that God has been very, very good to me.  I know that He has always provided in His way and in His time.  I know that He is working things out for my best.  Unfortunately, what I know and what I feel don't always mesh, and emotions are hard to argue with.

I hesitated to write this post today because I have no conclusion.  I'm still sorting through my feelings and emotions, which for me resembles the episode I had a few days ago as I tried to untangle the Christmas lights.  There are knots to untie and seams to unravel, but as of yet, I don't know how to answer my question.  Still, I couldn't get away from the urging to write this post.  Who knows--maybe you're feeling the same way?  Perhaps you're struggling with the same feelings of disappointment over a situation that didn't turn out the way you had expected.  I don't know.  What I do know, however, is that unrealistic expectations are very dangerous.  They can do some serious damage in our relationships with others and even in our relationship with the Lord.  Not to mention, they make us downright crabby to be around.

The old Christmas carol says, "Tis the season to be jolly", right?  Well, unrealistic expectations make that nearly impossible.  Let's lighten up, shall we?

Virtual Book Tour for Halo-Orangees: Employer-Employee

Book Synopsis

Is your work environment infected with the dysfunctional "I" and ME" Team Virus? "I" and "Me" are the driving forces behind dysfunctional organizational employer-employee relationships. This book embodies the message that all human beings have a purpose and can rise above any situation or circumstance as long as they remain ethically true to themselves. As you journey through this book, you will experience a multiplicity of real life work encounters such as, "A manager espoused her opinion that lower-paid employees should serve higher-paid employees". In this encounter, the manager also stated, "higher-salaried staff members are not paid to clean coffee pots" (Excerpt~ B.L. Brown). Halo-Orangees book is a movement with encouraging straightforwardness; Author B.L. Brown confronts real-life workplace issues occurring in organizations world-wide (negativity, drama, power struggles, backstabbing, and endless gossip). The Introduction is entitled, "Don't Allow Anyone to Confine You to a Box, Disabling Your Growth".
Halo-Orangees is a nonexclusive on the job survival manual, mindset enhancer, and stress reliever for both employers and employees. This book will change your life both personally and professionally.

Excerpt Quotes 

Your life purpose is to take the totality of your negative experiences, roll them up into one, and use them positively to lay the foundation for your destiny” (Excerpt~ B.L. Brown).

Don’t ever allow anyone to break your spirit of peace, control your mood, or suppress your workforce existence, making your tenure in the organization a horrible experience” (Excerpt~ B.L. Brown).

Don’t ever allow anyone to attack your self-esteem, kill your passion, or tell you that someone else is more worthy than you” (Excerpt ~B.L. Brown).

You are the only one who defines you, so don’t ever allow anyone to tell you who you are, or that you are not good enough” (Excerpt ~B.L. Brown).

Author Bio

B.L. Brown is the CEO and Founder of Halo-Orangees', international online job board (halo-orangeesjobs.com). Halo-Orangees’ international job board delivers candidates on time and under budget. Employers can post jobs and search resume database. Jobseekers can post resumes and search jobs for free. The genesis of Halo-Orangees Brand: Helping Advocate Longevity of Organizations by Obtaining Objectives through Redefining Above-Board New Generational Guidelines for Employer Employee Standards was inspired, developed, and birthed from her reaction to an unethical manager with whom she had the pleasure of working for and whose style of supervision made her stronger. In a one-on-one meeting with this executive director, he made the statement that another employee, who held the same title as B.L. Brown, was better than she was. In response, B.L. Brown informed him that this employee was not better than her nor was she better than the employee. From that one statement, she instantly realized her true purpose in life. "Best negative words spoken into my life thus far" (Excerpt~ B.L. Brown).

Reckoning her experience with a newfound belief, the foundation of Halo-Orangees emerged.  In 2012 Author B.L. Brown launched Halo-Orangees/h-connect brand, international online dating website h-connect.net. The h-connect.net brand is empowering, motivating singles to find their best friend in love.

For more information, please visit the author’s corporate website: http://www.halo-orangeesjobs.com/

www.h-connect.net

Purchase Links: http://www.amazon.com/dp/1432747584

Progress can also be followed via social media:

Website | Facebook | Twitter | Goodreads | Linkedin | H-connect

Disclaimer:  My participation in this book tour does not mean that I have read and/or agree with the work being promoted.  Typically, unless I'm doing a book review, I do not have the opportunity to read the books before promoting them. The purpose of virtual tours is to help fellow authors promote their works, and while I am very particular about who and what I promote, I cannot guarantee that the beliefs and views stated in any specific book are my own. 

 

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Thor Ramsey

Have You Been Mislabeled?

One of my all-time favorite activities to do with Jason is to visit the Goodwill Pound Store.  For those of you who are unfamiliar with what that is, allow me to explain.   The Goodwill Pound Store is a Goodwill Store where everything is priced by the pound instead of by individual tags or even according to specific categories.  Currently, the price is $1.29/pound.  The catch is that because the prices are so good, there's no time or effort spent on organization.  Unlike other thrift stores, when you walk in, you don't see racks and shelves.  Instead, you see gigantic bins piled high with clothes, shoes, toys, etc.  The store does a pretty good job of keeping clothes separate from the toys and books separate from the shoes.  In other words, there are bins for each, but in the clothes bins, anything goes.  You may find baby clothes, men's clothes, women's clothes, and so on.  If you want to find buried treasure, you have to dig.

I understand that for some people, this is simply too much work.  For me, however, it's like Christmas every time we go.  First of all, being the thrifty shopper I am, I love walking out of the store with a gigantic trash bag full of clothes and having spent $12.  It's fantastic!  Second, Jason and I really have a good time while digging.  We laugh at the colors and prints on some of the clothing we come across.  Jason's favorite thing to do is to pick two items that couldn't possibly clash any worse and say, "I think you need this outfit."  The whole process is truly a blast, but the fun doesn't stop there.

After we get our treasures home (most of which are mine), we have what Jason calls "our fashion show".  We try on all of our new pieces, checking for fit, comfort, etc.  When that's done, the real work begins.  I first cut off any tags that may be on the clothing.  (Believe it or not, I've often purchased clothes that still had the retailer tags on them, and most of the pieces came from high-end department stores.)  That done, I set about checking the labels and tossing the clothes into piles according to their washing instructions.  Typically, after that, I start the laundry because I can't wait to wear my new clothes. 

As I thought about the process of sorting according to labels, I wondered how often we do that with people.  Think about it.  Have you ever found yourself in a pile in which you knew you didn't belong simply because someone had mislabeled you?  Being a shy person, I've often found myself in the "snob" pile because my timidity was mistaken for arrogance.  And let me tell you, it hurts!  But I can't help but ask myself how often I mislabel others.

"She is so disorganized!"  - Maybe that's because her husband left her, and she now has to juggle three kids, a job, all the housework, all the errands, all the cooking and more than I could possibly every imagine.  Is she really disorganized, or is she simply overwhelmed?

"He's so thoughtless!" - Is he really, or do I consider him that way because he doesn't think the way I think?

"She's so unfriendly.  She didn't even say 'hello' when she passed me this morning." - Hmm, little did I know that she had just received a phone call that her mother has cancer, and she was doing all she could to hold back the tears until she reached the privacy of her office.

See what I mean?  We're so quick to pass judgment on others when we really have no idea what it's like to live their lives and walk in their shoes.  And so, without a thought, we stick a label on them and toss them into what we deem the appropriate pile to be dealt with accordingly.

The sad truth is that most of us should be stamped with a common label that reads, "handle with care".  We are tired.  We are weary.  We are frustrated.  We are struggling day after day to make life work, to make ends meet, to make a way for our families.  We don't need insensitive bystanders slapping labels on us and tossing us aside.  We need to be handled with care.  We need to have someone say, "No, I don't understand what you're going through, but I'm praying for you."  We need to know that someone cares.

Let's be careful with the labels.  We could really cause permanent damage. . . and that damage goes far beyond shrinkage or fading.

Let Me Guide You

This morning I decided to take Mitch on a different route for our morning walk.  Conveniently, the street on which we live connects to a road that runs parallel to the Swamp Rabbit Trail.  It's only about a five-minute walk from our house to the trail, and while we have to contend with some other walkers, runners and bicyclist, there's no vehicle traffic to worry about.  For me, this makes the walk much more relaxing.

When we reach the trail, we have a decision to make:  right or left.  We usually turn left because the trail connects to the other end of the main road, providing us with a two-mile circular loop.  Circles are good with Mitch because once he's going, he doesn't want to stop, and he's smart enough to know that turning around means eventually stopping.  So, the loop is our favorite.

When I walk alone, I turn to the right and typically follow the trail for about two miles, then turn around and come back.   It's a pleasant and peaceful walk that I enjoy immensely.  The only part I don't like is the part where I have to cross the very busy highway.  But overall, it's worth it!

Something got into me this morning, and I decided to take Mitch to the right.  I knew we'd have to be very careful at the highway crossing because Mitch was not familiar with this type of crossing.  On our normal trail, we cross the highway at a stoplight, which means we have a crosswalk signal.  Mitch has learned and now understands that he must wait for me to tell him to go, and then he can hurry his way across.  And he does hurry!  I think the cars intimidate him, which is probably a good thing.  But the crossing we faced this morning was not at a stoplight.  There were no signals.  Instead, there's a four-lane highway with a small median in the center.  On a good day, you might be able to get all the way across the road without stopping in the median, but not usually.

When we reached the road, I reeled Mitch in so that he had very little range in his leash.  I wanted to keep him close so he didn't dart out.  As I expected, he waited patiently at the edge of the road until I told him he could go.  As we made our way across the first two lanes of highway, I kept his leash reined in.  As we reached the median, I pulled tight and told him to stop.  He only pulled harder, determined to get across the street.  What he didn't know is that there was traffic coming, and we weren't going to make it to the other side before the traffic arrived.  We needed to wait, but he didn't understand that.  His danger alarm was going off, and he was responding by doing his best to pull us both out of harm's way.

The line of traffic was long, and Mitch became increasingly impatient and pulled even harder.  I tried to calm him.  I attempted to comfort him.  But my words were having no effect.  Finally, the traffic cleared, and I gave him some slack on the leash.  He ran across the last two lanes of highway and then promptly resumed his normal pace (which isn't much short of a run if I let him have his way).  As we walked, I tried once again to comfort and reassure him.  I could tell he was out of sorts.  I found myself saying, "You just have to trust Mommy and let me guide you.  I'll get us safely across, but you must listen to my directions."  The words weren't even completely out of my mouth before their message hit home.

How many times do I, like Mitch, try to find my own way through?  How many times have I plowed ahead in my impatience, frustration or fear?  How many times have I ignored the comforting and guiding voice of my Master because I thought I knew better?  How many times has God looked down at me and said, "Dana, you just have to trust your Father and let me guide you.  I'll get you safely across, but you must listen to my directions"?

By the time we crossed the street on our way back, Mitch had calmed down and understood better what to expect from this particular intersection.  He didn't pull.  He didn't fight.  He didn't try to have his own way.  He waited.  He listened.  And he followed my directions.  I pray that I will soon learn to do the same with my Master.

Unfinished Business

I have a confession to make:  I'm terrible about starting projects that I never finish.  Don't believe me?  I'll prove it to you by taking you on a short tour.  Let's begin in my office, for there are lots of unfinished projects here.  If you'll look in the tall filing cabinet, you'll see stories that I never finished, books that are missing the final touches and Sunday School lessons that I had intended to turn into book chapters. 

Next, let's visit the dining room, which tends to be used more for storage than for dining.  See those two quilts hanging over the chair.  One of them belongs to my parents.  I made it for them several years ago, but a few months back, a piece of the border became torn.  "No problem," I said, "just a few stitches should fix that right up."  Yet, there it hangs.  The other quilt belongs to my husband.  I made it for him several Christmases ago.  Since then, however, we have upgraded from a full-size bed to a queen-size, so the quilt is a little small.  "No problem," I said, "I'll just do up a few strips to add to the sides.  It shouldn't take too long."  So much for that thought.  This room also contains the wreath I was supposed to repair as well as the coffee table decoration I've had for so long that I forgot what I was asked to do with it.

From there, we can visit the living room and foyer which contain books I never finished reading and magazines I never finished studying.  A peek into the laundry room will show you the wood pieces intended to be used for the bench seat to my parents' dining room table.  (Oh wait, that's Jason's unfinished project, not mine.)  As you can see, unfinished projects are scattered around my house like the autumn leaves on the ground.   I don't mean to leave things undone.  I just get sidetracked, and before I know it, I'm so involved with another project, I don't have the time or energy to work on the previous one.  It's a complicated mess!

Aren't you glad God doesn't have unfinished business?  Not only did He complete His work on Calvary by sacrificing His only Son so that we could have eternal life, but He's also completing a work in each of us.  You see, when we were saved, we became new creatures, but that was just the beginning.  There is still so much growing and learning to do.  And that's what God does for us each and every day.  He loves us just the way we are, but He also loves us too much to leave us that way.  As the old children's song says, "He's still working on me to make me what I ought to be." 

None of us have arrived in our Christian walk, but we can take great comfort in knowing that God is still working on us.  Lovingly.  Faithfully.   Patiently.  Day after day.  We will never be left alone, forgotten or discarded like the myriad of unfinished projects around my home.  No!  God has begun a good work in us, and He won't stop until that work is completed.  No matter how long it takes or how difficult the task may be. 

Now, if you'll excuse me, it seems there are a lot of things I need to try to catch up on.  Hmm, where to begin?

Jeff Allen - Snoop Droopy Drawers

Virtual Book Tour: An Interview with Hy Conrad

Today we are privileged to have a special guest--Hy Conrad.  In December, I'll be posting a review for Hy's book, "Things Your Dog Doesn't Want You to Know".  But before I tell you how I feel about the book (hint:  it's a dog book, so that should give you some idea), I wanted to give you an opportunity to meet the man behind the masterpiece.  So, without further ado, let's get to the interview (hey, that rhymed!).


THE INTERVIEW:

DANA

Welcome, Hy. Would you please tell us a little about yourself.

HY

I began my working life as a stage actor, performing on Broadway and in national tours, among other places. One year, while working in summer stock, I came up with an idea for a play. It wound up having a short run Off-Broadway, and that began my writing career.

Today, I’m best known for my TV work. I was one of the original writers of the series “Monk” and wound up becoming the show’s Co-Executive Producer. From there I became head writer for the webisode series “Little Monk” and Consulting Producer on TV’s “White Collar.”

In the publishing world, I’ve written a dozen books of short mysteries which have been translated into over a dozen languages.

More recently, I wrote “Rally ‘Round the Corpse”, the first in my Abel Adventure mystery series. It was published a couple of months ago and is available just about everywhere.

DANA

What can you tell us about your book, “Things Your Dog Doesn’t Want You to Know”?

HY

“Things Your Dog Doesn’t Want You to Know” is a humor book, 115 essays “written” by 11 dogs who share their innermost secrets. They range from Tinkerbell, the world’s most spoiled Chihuahua to Axelrod, a yellow Lab who is puzzled by everything, from herb gardens to sofas to sprinkler systems.

The essays are short, two pages each, so each dog tells ten or eleven little stories about his life. Readers have told me they read one every night, or keep it on their coffee table to thumb through whenever the mood strikes.

DANA

As a dog owner, I have to ask this question; Do you own a dog (or dogs), and, if so, would you please tell us about them?

HY

For the past 25 years, I have had miniature Schnauzers. This dates back to the time I held a Boston Terrier up to my face and broke out in a rash. My doctor told me there were a limited number of breeds I could pick, ones that don’t shed or have dander. I chose Schnauzers and have loved them ever since.

My current pair – I always have two – are Charlie and Nelson. For much of the year they get to live on dozens of acres in the middle of the woods. The boys love to explore and have been known to a tree bear (the more docile black bears) and bring back deer bones. I never ask where they get them. I don’t want to know.

DANA

What inspired you to write this book?

HY

One night I happened to see a TV infomercial. It could have been “Things The Banks Don’t Want You to Know.” Or “Things The Government Doesn’t Want You to Know.” At some point, I said to myself, “Sure, how about ‘Things Your Dog Doesn’t Want You To Know.’” And that’s how it started; the title came first.

Like many humor books these days, this one began as a blog. I started posting on the most obvious topics: “What We Do When You’re Gone” or “Sticking My Head Out The Car Window.”

The initial idea was to keep them generic, in a sort of Everydog persona. But I soon realized that the humor was in the specifics. It was funnier if the dog had a real personality, and even funnier if we invented a variety of “dog bloggers” with radically different personalities.

DANA

What did you find to be the most difficult part of writing this book?

HY

I found that the tone was the trickiest part. The first essays were a little too sarcastic and didn’t have enough individual personality. Every story, I realized, has to draw you in quickly. This was a learned skill.

DANA

What are your plans and goals for the book?

HY

I don’t anticipate a movie sale, if that’s what you’re asking. But I think this could be an “evergreen” title that stays in print. I hope it can be big during the holiday season. The book was recently featured in Dog Fancy magazine as one of the perfect dog gifts for Christmas.

DANA

The essays in your book so describe the nature of dogs, and you tell each story with such humor. Do you consider yourself to have a very good sense of humor, or is it something you have to work at?

HY

I’ve always considered myself funny, but I became confident in my humor when the USA Network called me up and asked me to work on “Monk”. Suddenly I was in a room with five great comedy writers and found I could hold my own pretty well.

DANA

What projects are you currently working on?

HY

I’m always writing something. It’s my job and my only hobby. Most recently I was asked by USA and Obsidian Press to take over writing the “Monk” novels, a successful series of books based on the characters from the TV show. My friend Lee Goldberg wrote the first 15 novels, and I’ve been asked to write numbers 16 and 17.

DANA

Do you have plans for more books in the future? If so, what types of books will they be?

HY

As soon as I have a chance, I plan to finish the second novel in my Abel Adventures Mystery series, titled, “If I Die Before the Wake.” I also have an idea for a sequel to the dog book.

DANA

As a fellow author, I always like to ask this question: if you could describe the work of an author in three words, what would those words be?

HY

Alone, creating worlds. (That’s three words and a comma.)

DANA
I couldn't have put it better myself!  Thanks so much for sharing with us today, Hy.

ABOUT THE BOOK:

Why do dogs eat furniture when there are endless chew toys nearby?
Why do they always dash to a rug when they have to throw up?

And why are they always absolutely starving?

Things Your Dog Doesn’t Want You to Know answers the questions that dog owners have asked for centuries. The book is a collection of 115 humorous essays that reveal the truth behind some of the most baffling canine behavior, their hopes and dreams, their grudges and pleasures, and what they really think about us humans. Peppered with lively, clever stories and visually appealing photographs, Things Your Dog Doesn’t Want You to Know is a verbal and visual delight that is laugh-out-loud funny. If you have dogs, love dogs, or have ever been baffled by a dog, this book is a must-have.

Topics include:

• My Life in Your Purse by Tinkerbell, the Chihuahua
• Waiting by the Table (for food scraps, of course!) by Orson, the bulldog
• The Bed Rules (Rule #1—It’s my bed) by Dimples, the boxer
• The Reason I Ate the Sofa (leather tastes a lot like rawhide) by Axelrod, the yellow lab
• I Can Poop the Second I Start My Walk (but choose not to) by Sophie, the cocker spaniel

Things Your Dog Doesn’t Want You to Know is available at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Indigo, Target, on e-books and at independent bookstores everywhere. For more information, go to www.ThingsYourDog.com where you can also ask questions about your own dog’s behavior and learn the secrets they have been keeping from you!

ABOUT THE AUTHORS: 

ABOUT HY CONRAD

Best known for his work in mysteries, Hy was one of the original writers for the groundbreaking series, Monk, working on the show for all eight seasons, the final two as Co-Executive Producer. In a related project, Hy was Executive Producer and head writer of Little Monk, a series of short films featuring Adrian Monk as a ten-year-old. His latest TV work was as writer and Consulting Producer for White Collar.

Hy is also the author of hundreds of short stories and ten books of short whodunits, which have been sold around the world in fourteen languages. Hy’s first mystery novel series, Abel Adventures, will debut in 2012 with the publication of Rally ‘Round the Corpse. And his first full-length comedy/mystery play, Home Exchange, premiered at the Waterfront Playhouse in May 2012. He lives in Key West with his partner and two miniature schnauzers. (www.hyconrad.com)

ABOUT JEFF JOHNSON 
Jeff spent most of his working life in advertising agencies, currently as General Manager of Cramer-Krasselt in New York City. He is the author of The Hourglass Solution:  A Boomer’s Guide to the Rest of Your Life and co-authors (with Paula Forman) a national online advice column called Short Answers, which also appears in newspapers all along the east coast (from Massachusetts to Florida). Jeff lives in Vermont and Key West and is on the Board of Directors of the Waterfront Playhouse and the Florida Keys SPCA.

LINKS:

WEBSITE LINK: www.ThingsYourDog.com

AUTHOR LINK: www.HyConrad.com

AMAZON LINK: Things Your Dog Doesn't Want You to Know: Eleven Courageous Canines Tell All

GIVEAWAY:

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Draw Nigh to God

One topic that I come across often in devotional books is how to draw closer to Jesus. It has been discussed from many pulpits and in countless conferences. The advice given ranges from complete and total surrender to Christ to completing the work He has sent us here to do. Often, the advice is helpful, but sometimes the answers are so complex. Should it be that way?

My advice on the topic is that you draw closer to Jesus in the same way that you grow closer to your friends or family. You spend time with Him. You talk with Him and listen as He speaks to you. You share your cares, burdens, and joys with Him. You laugh and cry with Him. You work through things together and complete tasks in the company of one another. You learn more about Him and in turn, allow yourself to be known.

Treat Him like the Friend that He is. Rely on Him like the Father He is. It may sound simple, but I think that's the way God intended it. We are often guilty of over-complicating things. Do you want to be closer to Christ today? It is possible, but some time and effort on your part are required.

Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. - James 4:8

It's All About the Wait

Last week, I posted an article about my recent experimentation with Apple Cider Vinegar.  (If you missed that post, you can read it here.)  I've been taking it faithfully each day and have even increased my dosage to two tablespoons per day (one in the morning and one in the evening).  So far, I have noticed very little improvement.  There has been some change in my digestion, but that's about all I've noticed so far.

That's the tricky part about natural remedies--they aren't instant fixes.  In our fast-paced world, we feel we can't afford to wait for anything.  That's why we have express lanes, speedy checkouts, drive-throughs and microwaveable dinners.  We're in a hurry, and with that mindset, it's difficult to choose the overall better option over the faster one.  You see, natural remedies are just that--they are natural, and they are remedies.  Unlike many medications and prescription drugs today, natural remedies don't just mask the systems of any problems.  They actually get into your body's systems and work to repair any damage.  That process takes time, which means we have to wait for the results.

Wait?  That's a four-letter word, isn't it?  We don't like that word.  We don't want to wait.  I'm sorry to tell you this, but we are spoiled.  We want what we want, and we want it right now.   And so often, we choose convenience and speed over quality and goodness, resulting in unsolved problems that are hidden, but still very present and very detrimental.

Thankfully, I know enough about natural remedies and have enough experience with them that I'm not put off at this stage in my ACV experimentation.  I know I'm doing a good thing for my health, and even though I don't see any real results yet, I'm going to keep doing what I know to do.  Why?  Because I know the results will come.  It's just a matter of time.  If I'll be faithful, I will reap the benefits.  I just have to be willing to wait.

I'm think I'm finally getting to a place in my spiritual walk where I can look at my difficult circumstances and see the benefits waiting on the other side.  After all, I know enough about God and have enough experience with His ways to know that He always works for my good.  During those tough times of waiting, I know that if I'll just keep doing what I know to do, even when I don't see any results, I will eventually reap the benefits.  It's just a matter of time if I will continue to be faithful.  I just have to be willing to wait.  Wait for the Lord's guidance.  Wait for the Lord's blessings.  Wait for the Lord to open the doors of opportunity.  Wait for the Lord to reveal the treasures awaiting me on the other side of my stormy circumstances.

Every day we have some tough decisions to make.  Will we take the fast road or the best road?  Will we choose convenience over goodness?  Will we put our own desires above those that the Lord has for our lives?  Will we allow God to remedy the wrongs in our lives, or will we simply cover them up?  Will we be willing to wait through the bitter in order for our lives to be better?  It's a lot to think about.

 But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. - Isaiah 40:31

Run It Through the Filter First

All you coffee lovers out there are going to love this.  It's morning.  You stagger, bleary-eyed toward your favorite possession in all the world--the coffee pot.  Before you even reach the kitchen, the enticing smell of fresh coffee assaults your senses.  (God bless the person who invented the automatic timer.)  Your body responds to the call of the coffee by quickening its shuffle.  Your mouth waters as you pull a cup from the cabinet and turn toward the coffee pot.  But as soon as you begin to pour, you become acutely aware that something is desperately wrong.  Instead of a smooth, black liquid, your coffee resembles a dark, soup full of coffee grounds.  In desperation, you flip open the lid.  Sure enough, whoever made the coffee forgot the put the filter in.  You now have two choices:  (1) Drink the watery grounds,  or (2) Dump it out, and start again.  (Okay, maybe you coffee drinkers don't like this scenario after all.  I can feel your accusing stares coming at me from the computer screen.  I think I'd better move on to my point. . . while you're waiting for that second batch of coffee to brew.)

The world is full of filters.  There are water filters, air filters, oil filters, coffee filters and so on.  Dictionary.com defines a filter as "any substance, as cloth, paper, porous porcelain, or a layer of charcoal or sand, through which  liquid or gas is passed to remove suspended impurities or to recover solids."  To put it plainly, a filter removes the bad and leaves the good.

Unfortunately, one of the areas that is most in need of a filter is often the most neglected, left at the mercy of a myriad of impurities.  That area is the mind.  Think about how much information our minds process during any given day.  It's mind-boggling.  (Sorry, I couldn't resist the pun!)  The awesome thing is that we don't really have to control our minds in most things.  It tells the body what to do and how to feel, and it pretty much does it on auto-pilot, just the way God designed it to work.  That's a blessing until we put our entire thought processes on auto-pilot too.  Do we have any idea how much junk goes through our minds on a daily basis?  Again, it's mind-boggling.  (Okay, sorry, I'll stop with the puns now.)

Fortunately, there is a filter for the mind, and it can be found in the word of God.  Philippians 4:8 tells us, Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.  What better filter for each and every thought that passes our way?  Let's try it out.

For the past couple of days, I've been suffering through another attack of my bursitis.  It's painful and inconvenient for it prevents me from getting things accomplished.  When I crawled out of bed this morning, the first thought that assaulted me was, I can't face the pain again today.  Let's run that through our filter.  Whatsoever things are true and honest.  I can't face the pain?  The Bible says that I can do ALL things through Christ which strengtheneth me.  So to say that I can't face the pain is not true.  I don't want to face it, but I know I can.

Every thought, no matter how big or small, no matter how innocent it may seem, needs to be run through the filter.  Otherwise, the result is a buildup of bitterness and resentment caused by a mountain of thoughts that shouldn't have been held onto to begin with.  They should have been filtered out as soon as we were aware of them.  Just as coffee drinkers don't want a cup of grounds swimming in a pool of blackened water (say "Amen" right there), neither should Christians want a mind jumbled with thoughts swimming in a pool of bitterness and regret.  It's time for us to start paying as much attention to what we think as we do to what we drink.

Okay, I'm done now.  You can go get that cup of coffee.  I know it's calling to you.  Just promise me one thing--you won't kill the person who forgot to put the filter in the first time.  We're only human after all!

Tim Hawkins - Helper in the Car

Top 10 Predictions No Matter Who Wins the Election

1. The Bible will still have all the answers.
2. Prayer will still work.
3. The Holy Spirit will still move.
4. God will still inhabit the praises of His people.
5. There will still be God-anointed preaching.
6. There will still be singing of praise to God.
7. God will still pour out blessings upon His people.
8. There will still be room at the Cross.
9. Jesus will still love you.
10. Jesus will still save the lost when they come to Him.

GOD APPROVES THIS MESSAGE!
ISN'T IT GREAT TO KNOW WHO IS REALLY IN CONTROL!!

The Lord Giveth and Taketh Away

Monday did not turn out the way we had planned.  Jason had the day off, so we thought it would be the perfect day to take the dogs on a nice, long hike.  The weather was beautiful.  The fall colors were beckoning.  Yes, a hike sounded wonderful, and we knew just the right location.  Being a Monday, it shouldn't be crowded at all, and the trail offered a long, not-too-strenuous hike.  Eager to be on our way, we got up, ate some breakfast, packed the bags and headed out to our destination.

Once we hit the main drive to the trail, we knew we had picked the wrong day to do that particular hike.  Dozens of hunters with pickup trucks and hunting dogs crowded the drive.  The trail we were headed to was closed to hunters, but the way I see it, stray bullets don't know that.  With all these hunters in the vicinity, I was growing very anxious about being out on the trail. . . especially with our dogs.  Little did I know that the crowded trail was really a blessing in disguise.

We continued our way up the winding, bumpy road.  All of a sudden, everything in the car started blinking on and off.  The radio went on and off.  The dials and lights on the dash went crazy.  Something was wrong.  Then we smelled it--the acrid stench of an electrical fire.  As soon as we found a place wide enough to pull over, we did.  The car shut itself off, and everything locked up.  Jason popped the hood and ran to the front of the vehicle.  The diagnosis was not good.  Somehow, in the midst of the bumping and jostling, the metal band that runs across the top of the battery had completely come loose on one end and was tapping against one of the posts of the battery.  The metal-on-metal contact created a complete circuit for the electric current.  In short, it fried the battery.

I sat in the vehicle with the dogs as Jason jogged back down the mountain road, hoping that the many hunters were still on the main road and that the battery would at least take a charge.  (Let me remind you that if all those hunters hadn't been on the road that day, I don't know how far Jason would have had to walk to find help.) As I strove to calm the dogs who were uncertain why they couldn't get out and play, I prayed.  "Lord, why did this have to happen?  We just wanted to have a nice day.  Is it too much to ask for one week to pass us by without something breaking?  We can't afford to buy a new battery right now."

Suddenly, I stopped and realized that the last statement was not true.  Last week, out of the blue, God had blessed us with several different financial blessings.  Jason received a raise and was given two very generous tips for his work.  I had sold a handful of books.  We even received a check in the mail for a survey we had completed.  Even though the amounts weren't elaborate, we were awed by the different sources of unexpected income.

As I sat waiting in the broken-down vehicle, this phrase came to my mind:  the Lord giveth and taketh away; blessed be the name of the Lord.  Sure, I was frustrated, but I quickly realized I had two ways of looking at the situation:  (1) I could be upset that every time we get ahead a little financially, an unexpected expense occurs; or (2) I could be thankful that God provides the means to get ahead a little financially so that when the unexpected expenses occur, we have the funds to take care of them.  With God's help, I chose the latter option on Monday. 

We were able to jumpstart the vehicle and drive it to an auto parts store.  When the car wouldn't start back up, we knew the battery was finished, so we purchased a new one and had it installed right there in the parking lot of the auto parts store.  In an attempt to salvage the day, we headed toward an alternate hike and enjoyed the remainder of the day without further incident (unless you count sore muscles and a minor slip on some fallen leaves).

No, it was not the day I had envisioned, but the ordeal served as a good reminder to me that God is watching out for us.  He provided the money for the new battery before we even knew we needed one.  That's just like God.  As always, He's taking care of us and meeting our needs in ways we never dreamed of.  I think the songwriter said it best when she wrote, "Even in the valley, God is good."